Islam, Religion of Peace

Ah yes, Islam, Religion of Peace-TM.

Via Petulant at Shakesville comes news of the delightful Anjem Choudary, a self-styled 'judge of the Sharia Court of the UK':

He said: 'If a man likes another man, it can happen, but if you go on to fulfil your desire, if it is proved, then there is a punishment to follow. You don't stone to death unless there are four eyewitnesses. It is a very stringent procedure.
'There are some people who are attracted to donkeys but that does not mean it is right.'
Choudary was speaking at a press conference in London arranged by Muslim extremists to justify their protest in Luton last week against soldiers returning home from Iraq.

That's right - just last week he was justifying a protest in Luton (been there!) against soldiers returning home from Iraq.

I'm sure any minute now all the moderate, peace-loving Muslims who disagree with Choudary will be rising up in protest.

. . . crickets . . .

Meanwhile, one wonders how much government assistance Choudary and his fellow fanatics (see the piece from the Mail Online for some photos of these Neanderthals and to read more about their warnings of another 7/7 attack - nice) receive from their country of residence, into which they are clearly assimilating well (not).

UPDATE 3/26/2009 10:54PM

Just watched Rachel's moving interview with Anwar Sadat's widow, who said that Islam is not a religion of "revenge and killing". More Jehan Sadats, please . . . NO Anjem Choudarys.

This is from Mrs. Sadat's 3/26/2009 piece in the WSJ:

In conditions like these, how could anyone hope for peace?

I do. I believe that now, with tensions the highest they have ever been, the urgent need for renewed efforts is staring us in the face. It's time to re-examine my husband's method of making peace.

First, we must recognize that people in the region want peace. Our leaders must commit to making and keeping the peace that its citizens crave. Second, our leaders need to be realistic while being real. No leader in the Arab world except Sadat believed peace could be made with a Likud leader. I hope Benjamin Netanyahu will follow Begin's example. Furthermore, my husband was sincere in his desire for peace, and his style of face-to-face negotiating proved it. Third, the peace process requires serious work. For many, the so-called peace process in the Middle East has become a myth -- a lot of talk with few results. Sadat believed that as president, he had to be the engine and energy behind the peace process. Fourth, we need to forgive. President Carter once said that my husband was "more inclined to look toward the future than to dwell on the hate-filled and often bloody past." Today's leaders must make peace, not the past, their focus.

I am leaving out a final point about having faith - "a steadfast determination to enact God's will to love our enemy". Is a belief in magic a prerequisite for peace? Uh-oh.

Leave. Bankers. Alooonnnnne!

Seriously, I found this post by Mr. Sullivan (and letter by Jake DeSantis, an executive vice president of the American International Group’s financial products unit, to which he links) very interesting:

What Prejudice Is

The letter from Jake DeSantis in the NYT today is a very powerful reminder that bankers have human rights too. We are very used to understanding the idea that judging a person on the basis of unjust and untrue generalizations about the color of their skin is wrong. We call that racism. But when we make broad-brush accusations against all bankers, or even all bankers at a particular company, no such ethical restraint is required. Of course, this is not entirely nuts. The experience of bankers in human history is a little less oppressed, to put it mildly, than most African-Americans. But the core moral point is the same: we should always try to judge the individual, not the group.

The relatively privileged are often excused from this rule. And maybe this is fine most of the time, given their wealth and power. But it remains true that the individual obliterated by his fellows in this way is as human as anyone else. He or she is not worth less than someone in far less comfy circumstances. If we prick them, do they not bleed?

I remember very vividly an occasion at Oxford, where I was engaging in a bit of unreflective class warfare against Etonians, those very privileged members of British society who went to one of the best private schools in the world.

Later, a friend of mine who was an Etonian took me aside and let me know that he was aware of how privileged he was, but equally he felt that the Etonian label, used to marginalize him and sum his entire life up, was unfair. He deserved to be seen as a human being first.

Hatred of those with more perceived power than you is still hatred. It is different than the contempt of the strong for those they they view as weak. In its structure, anti-Semitism is constructed differently than racism in the human psyche. But hatred out of envy is no less wounding or dangerous than hatred out of contempt - as we've seen with the horrifying consequences of anti-Semitism in recent history. And when it is wielded by mobs and ginned up by elites, it can be very dangerous.

This piece and Mr. DeSantis's letter are five thousand times more reasonable than the obnoxious, misleading whining of CNBC's unwatchable caricatures.

UPDATE 3/25/2009 5:54PM

lol - Digby called DeSantis's letter a "petulant whine from someone who made a $750,000 bonus from AIGFP and feels so hurt and betrayed by all the mean things that are being said about him that he's going to quit and give his bonus to charity. No word about whether he thinks he should get his charitable deduction, but I'll bet he'll scream bloody murder if he doesn't get it."

I still say it's better than Michelle Caruso Cabrera's perpetual sneer.

Things I Love: Six Degrees of Separation . . . The Movie

Can't we all relate to some extent? At the risk of a gross overshare, for me, it's emphasizing my family's Jewishness when it's to my advantage, de-emphasizing it while noting my WASP-y last name and looks when it's not, or making reference to a UHB status (see: Metropolitan) that may or may not exist. (Can Jews ever be true preps? I think not.) Tricky, no?

Isn’t it a bit chilling when (the execrable) Will Smith regurgitates his faux analysis (rehearsed and learned in exchange for sex with Anthony Michael Hall) of Catcher in the Rye?:

“ . . . . a touching story, comic because the boy wants to do so much, and can’t do anything
Hates all phoniness, and only lies to others
Wants everyone to like him, but is only hateful, and is completely self-involved.”

I was led to this YouTube tidbit by TNC, who has a link to We are respectable negroes at his Atlantic Monthly site. As I read the post in which my beloved Flan and Ouisa are held up as some kind of added incentive to confess in the Church of White Liberal Guilt in the respectable negroes' blog, I found myself saying "Gawd - looking for slights much?" . . . but then, don't I have a running series of "Anti-Gay of the Day" posts??

Things that make you go "Hrmmmmm". I tell ya.

----------

SIDEBAR: Who knows what that upbeat, disco-y song is towards the end of the trailer? It's also in the movie for a few moments at a highly-charged, spoiler-laden moment that I shall not reveal here. Unfortunately it's not included in the magnificent soundtrack. :(

Apologies, again, for the YouTube formatting flaw.

Oh, HELL no

Seems Ms. Tammy Bruce, substitute hack for Laura Ingraham's incendiary radio gabfest, has been sharing her opinion of First Lady Michelle Obama:

That's what he's married to," Bruce said. ... "You know what we've got? We've got trash in the White House. Trash is a thing that is colorblind, it can cross all eco-socionomic ... categories. You can work on Wall Street, or you can work at the Wal-Mart. Trash, are people who use other people to get things, who patronize others, who consider you bitter and clingy."

You know, I really would hate to have to cut a bitch. Where the hell does Miss Obviously Not Colorblind Thing get off calling the Obamas trash??

Way to remind all the colorblind wingnut listeners that our uppity yet trashy President said they were bitter and clingy. Real smooth one there, Tammy. (How could anyone possibly think you and your audience of real 'murcans were bitter?)

[Via Shakesville via TNC, where, as commenter wallyz wrote: "Of course, now we all know who tammy bruce is. Whee. Win for the attention whore."]

Group Pearl Clutch

It was last week that Dick Cheney went on TV with courtesan John King of CNN and demonstrated once again what an infuriatingly creepy, shameless, demented, and evil shitstain he is.

As a recap, here's former chief of staff to Secretary of State Colin Powell Lawrence Wilkerson (and guest of Rachel Maddow last week) in a guest post on The Washington Note:

Recently, in an attempt to mask some of these failings and to exacerbate and make even more difficult the challenge to the new Obama administration, former Vice President Cheney gave an interview from his home in McLean, Virginia. The interview was almost mystifying in its twisted logic and terrifying in its fear-mongering.

As to twisted logic: "Cheney said at least 61 of the inmates who were released from Guantanamo (sic) during the Bush administration...have gone back into the business of being terrorists." So, the fact that the Bush administration was so incompetent that it released 61 terrorists, is a valid criticism of the Obama administration? Or was this supposed to be an indication of what percentage of the still-detained men would likely turn to terrorism if released in future? Or was this a revelation that men kept in detention such as those at GITMO--even innocent men--would become terrorists if released because of the harsh treatment meted out to them at GITMO? Seven years in jail as an innocent man might do that for me. Hard to tell.

As for the fear-mongering: "When we get people who are more interested in reading the rights to an Al Qaeda (sic) terrorist than they are with protecting the United States against people who are absolutely committed to do anything they can to kill Americans, then I worry," Cheney said. Who in the Obama administration has insisted on reading any al-Qa'ida terrorist his rights? More to the point, who in that administration is not interested in protecting the United States--a clear implication of Cheney's remarks.

But far worse is the unmistakable stoking of the 20 million listeners of Rush Limbaugh, half of whom we could label, judiciously, as half-baked nuts. Such remarks as those of the former vice president's are like waving a red flag in front of an incensed bull. And Cheney of course knows that.

Cheney went on to say in his McLean interview that "Protecting the country's security is a tough, mean, dirty, nasty business. These are evil people and we are not going to win this fight by turning the other cheek." I have to agree but the other way around. Cheney and his like are the evil people and we certainly are not going to prevail in the struggle with radical religion if we listen to people such as he.

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs had this to say in response to Cheney's mad mutterings:

"I guess Rush Limbaugh was busy, so they trotted out the next most popular member of the Republican cabal. . . . Not taking economic advice from Dick Cheney might be the best possible outcome of yesterday's interview."

Naturally, the "prissy hall monitors" (thank you Joan Walsh--see below) of the Washington media reacted not to Cheney's vile statements, but the the White House's response. I'll let Glenn Greenwald take it from here:

Some reporters are horrified that Dick Cheney would be spoken of with such disrespect. CBS' Chip Reid immediately objected (and the video conveys even more than the words how offended he was):

Can I ask you, when you referred to the former Vice President, that was a really hard-hitting, kind of sarcastic response you had. This is a former Vice President of the United States. Is that the attitude -- is that the sanctioned tone toward the former Vice President of the United States from this White House now?

On his Twitter feed, ABC News' Rick Klein was similarly aghast at Gibbs' disrespect:

Wait - there's more. Uber-putz Chuck Todd of MSNBC asked, "Is Robert Gibbs' open disdain for Cheney acceptable to a president who promised to move beyond petty political squabbling? And does the president agree with Gibbs' description of the loyal opposition as 'the Republican cabal'?"

Loyal opposition? Hello?? Could the Washington media be any more short-sighted? As Glenn wrote:

How bizarre that Cheney can accuse of Obama of the most heinous acts (and, in my view, Cheney is perfectly within his rights as a citizen to do so), and the glorified gossip columnists who play the role of journalists on TV (what (Joan) Walsh calls "prissy hall monitors") can hardly contain their anger over Gibbs' far more mild response.

More to the point: imagine what things might be like if TV journalists had shown just a fraction of the interest in, and outrage over, Dick Cheney's torture and chronic lawbreaking as they have for these petty offenses to his honor and good name.

dday at Digby's blog picked up on the glaring, throbbing double standard as well:

The scribblers from the White House Press Corps have dropped their teacups and opened windows for air after the vicious, uncouth attack on their dear friend Dick Cheney by Press Secretary Robert Gibbs.

This reminded me of an all-time classic by Dibgy from last June when Gen. Wesley Clark replied to Bob Schieffer's ridiculous statement that unlike John McCain (R-Get Off My Lawn), Obama had not "ridden in a fighter plane and gotten shot down" by saying "Well, I don't think riding in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to be president."

Does Anyone Have A Spare Lace Hankie?

...the Village is running short.

This is getting really comical. The LaVyrle Spencer Book Review And Ladies Circle Jerk Society had a conference call today. And they were utterly shocked *SHOCKED, I TELL YOU* to the point of near delirium:

"I was utterly shocked," Sen. John Warner, R-Va., told the conference call, "... that he would in such a disrespectful way attack one of his fellow career military officers."

"Beyond comprehension ... further erosion of our nation's political discourse," said former Sen. Bob Dole, R-Kan., in a written statement.

"Complete silliness," retired Navy Lt. Cmdr. Carl Smith said on the call.

Retired Marine Lt. Col. Orson Swindle said Clark was "denigrating the character and the experience and the integrity and the performance" of McCain.

"A very indecent thing," said retired Air Force Col. Bud Day.

You are no Officer or Gentleman, General Wesley Clark! I shall have my butler escort you from the parlor and remove you from the company of these well bred gentle ladies before you further erode the discourse with your shocking indecency. The honor of her Grace the Duchess of Sedona shall not be besmirched by your kind, sirrah!

James, burn some feathers and fetch my salts immediately. The Dowager Lady Swindle just fainted dead away!

And bring us some tea and cream cakes. We're feeling peckish.

Can we expect a massive pearl clutch the next time someone churns out one of the tired right wing talking snickering points about former Vice President Al Gore? Not holding my breath.

UPDATE 3/20/2009 11:00PM

First sentence modified: ", demented, and" added and "White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs had this to say in response" changed to "White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs had this to say in response to Cheney's mad mutterings"

UPDATE 3/20/2009 11:15PM

I was just re-reading Chuck Todd's bullshit question: "Is Robert Gibbs' open disdain for Cheney acceptable to a president who promised to move beyond petty political squabbling?" OMG, shut the fuck up you pompous twit!! You know how in Whit Stillman's Metropolitan, when Chris Eigeman's Nick is nursing his bloody nose after a run-in with the evil (but hot) Rick Von Slonaker and (justifiably) upbraiding his friends for their "This looks really bad, Nick" response? If you remember the voice in which he said "This looks really bad, Nick", that's the exact voice in which Chuck Todd's question should be asked . . . or maybe an Eric Cartman voice would be more "appropriate".

Waaaaaa

OK, I really, really wish I had been paying attention . . . I would have so dropped everything in order to be at this Purim Carnival to End All Purim Carnivals. Via the hotness that is Eric Leven:



A Purim Party at Eastern Bloc?? My head is going to explode.

MONEY QUOTE: Jews + Freebies = Not To Be Missed

Sure beats Temple Sinai, Fox Point, WI, March 1977.

Damn. Note to self for next year.

Benji can Bake My Hamantaschen anytime.

Anti-Gay (?) of the Day, Part VIII

Next up in this cheerful series, and worlds away from the previous installment, is this TNR piece (thank you, Mr. Sullivan) by Seyward Darby. (Could that name be any more Southern?) Darby writes:

. . . there's one major problem with the neat morality play that left-leaning Duke haters have constructed for themselves: the jarring and disproportionate level of homophobia that routinely gets directed at the basketball players.

Perhaps friend, Duke alum, and Echo Chamber lurker JD could come out of the shadows and comment?

Question

Who told McDonald's they needed to start putting nutrition information on the french fry containers??? What's the point of that??

A Time and A Place

Just having a moment here . . . I happened upon "Everybody Wants To Rule the World" by Tears for Fears on my iPod and was immediately transported back to June 1985. I had lived through the hell that was suburban high school and would be starting college (aka going to school with people who wanted to be there, aka semi-adulthood) in the fall . . . and, what's more - I was about to embark on the second of five glorious summers in the (all-male) Madison Scouts Drum & Bugle Corps.

Now, don't laugh, all you fabulon haters out there. Yes, the drum corps part might sound incredibly geeky, but to this day it remains a seminal experience in my life. I can't say enough about how much this wonderful organization and activity have meant to me. Throughout the dreadful years of high school, drum corps and winter guard were a part of my life in which I was valued and talented and accepted. Without them, I don't know what I would have done.

1985 was the summer that I admitted to myself and friends (Steve L) that I was/am gay. I look back on that year with incredible fondness. Steve L, Michael P, Robert S, KC M, David R, Ron D, Mitch W, Tim N, John G: Thank you all so much for the fun times and moments that I'll never forget. Thanks as well to the handful of hotties in the musical ensemble about whom I fantasized then and do so every now and then now. Rich R, although we did not fully bond until years later, I hate to think what my life would be like without you.

Ah, life. Le sigh.

Anti-Gay of the Day, Part VII

How much stupidity and ignorance can the brain process?

This story will test those limits. Via Mr. Sullivan, a link to the Guardian UK's piece on "corrective rapes" of lesbians in South Africa:

The partially clothed body of Eudy Simelane, former star of South Africa's acclaimed Banyana Banyana national female football squad, was found in a creek in a park in Kwa Thema, on the outskirts of Johannesburg. Simelane had been gang-raped and brutally beaten before being stabbed 25 times in the face, chest and legs. As well as being one of South Africa's best-known female footballers, Simelane was a voracious equality rights campaigner and one of the first women to live openly as a lesbian in Kwa Thema.

Her brutal murder took place last April, and since then a tide of violence against lesbian women in South Africa has continued to rise. Human rights campaigners say it is characterised by what they call "corrective rape" committed by men behind the guise of trying to "cure" lesbian women of their sexual orientation.

Now, a report by the international NGO ActionAid, backed by the South African Human Rights Commission, condemns the culture of impunity around these crimes, which it says are going unrecognised by the state and unpunished by the legal system.

The report calls for South Africa's criminal justice system to recognise hate crimes, including corrective rape, as a separate crime category. It argues this will force police to take action over the rising violence and ensure the resources and support is provided to those trying to bring perpetrators to justice.

Dear Mr. South African Dumbass Douchebag with Gucci Baseball Cap on Sideways in the Video: You and your ilk are the "inhuman" ones. (I don't like you and I don't appreciate your style, either.)

South Beach is Dead

Dead to me that is. It's going strong with another segment of the population.

I'm just back from a business/"pleasure" trip to Miami and Miami Beach. After two days at a conference in downtown Miami, we headed up to vaunted South Beach - oy oy oy. Yes, it's Spring Break, but the volume and nastiness of thug wannabes and skank hoochies (of all racial and ethnic backgrounds) was mind-boggling. Maybe I'm getting old - wevs - but I could not stand to be out and about on Collins Ave. I'm not sure I've ever encountered a more menacingly prurient atmosphere.

A visit to Yuca, a once white-hot old favorite, on Thursday night was a mixed bag . . . ghastly service (our first waitress didn't know what Beefeater gin is--fortunately we never saw her again), but the food was still tasty.

OLA saved the day - OLA stands for Of Latin America. It is one of James Beard winner Douglas Rodriguez's restaurants, and it was beyond. Just beyond.

Our server, Rodriguez's brother Frank, delivered two of the best things I've ever tasted to our table - the crispy pork and the churrasco. Read a bit more about OLA in Mark Bittman's NYT review from just over two years ago.

Guilty Pleasure

I have just devoured this book.



It's E. Lynn Harris's latest, Basketball Jones. I bought it in the Phoenix airport when I left one of the other ten books to which I'm not devoting enough time in my luggage: Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali. Talk about two ends of the continuum! [That is so not a dig at Harris's book; both are excellent reading--it's the subject matter that's at two ends of said continuum.]

I love books that you can't put down. The Emperor's Children by Claire Messud was the last one that I stayed up (too) late to read. I did the same thing last night with Basketball Jones--I had to get to the end. Basketball Jones is the story of an NBA star on the down low and his former college tutor and their ultra-secret relationship. It's part sociological study, part thriller. Which characters are based on people that Harris knows or knows of in Atlanta, NOLA . . . and the NBA?? This book is laden with tidbits of popular culture, some widely-known and some specific to the black gay community (not that those two things are necessarily mutually exclusive).

Captivating! I've read one of Harris's other books and I think I want to check out the rest.

Calling All Boys

Ah, early MTV. Who can forget? Suddenly those of us growing up in suburbia had a new non-stop stream of pop culture creativity (in all its occasionally ghastly forms) in our homes. Late at night they'd broadcast the "really edgy" stuff. Hang out long enough and you might even catch some Bronski Beat (!) or Bow Wow Wow (that drummer - schwing).

Here's one of the very best videos of the age . . . Queen's "Calling All Girls".



How adorably vulnerable / sexy / handsome is Freddie M. at about 0:49? What a mouth. I loved him . . . and I so wanted that shirt!! (27 years ago, of course - now I'd look like Daffyd Thomas in it.) To me, "Calling All Girls" is one the band's best songs (Freddie is in radiant, magnificent voice), and despite what iTunes calls its "cruel critical and commercial fate", I think Hot Space might be my favorite Queen album.

Hail to the Chief!

I. Love. This:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

It's (rather handsome) Washington Wizards fan Miles Rawls, talking with Keith about his "interactions" with President Obama at the Wizards-Bulls game.

Look at the pics they show of Obama at the game. I love the expressions on his face. So awesome - I am just that much more thrilled that he is our president.

(Keith saying "speechifying" was a little bit cringe-worthy, but wevs.)

More Good Times

How desperate for the adulation of your fellow wingnuts and removed from reality do you have to be to spend a not insignificant amount of time and money trying to prove that Barack Obama was not born in the U.S.? Gregory S. Hollister (the plaintiff in Hollister v. Soetoro) might know.

According to U.S. District Judge James Robertson (evidently a member of the reality-based community),

This case, if it were allowed to proceed, would deserve mention in one of those books that seek to prove that the law is foolish or that America has too many lawyers with not enough to do. Even in its relatively short life the case has excited the blogosphere and the conspiracy theorists. The right thing to do is to bring it to an early end.

The plaintiff says that he is a retired Air Force colonel who continues to owe fealty to his Commander-in-Chief (because he might possibly be recalled to duty) and who is tortured by uncertainty as to whether he would have to obey orders from Barack Obama because it has not been proven -- to the colonel’s satisfaction -- that Mr. Obama is a native-born American citizen, qualified under the Constitution to be President. The issue of the President’s citizenship was raised, vetted, blogged, texted, twittered, and otherwise massaged by America’s vigilant citizenry during Mr. Obama’s two-year-campaign for the presidency, but this plaintiff wants it resolved by a court.

[In Kid from Simpsons voice:] Ha-ha!

Thank you, Daily Kos.

"But Now We Have a Black President!!"

This has made my day. Every sentence cracks me up.



That is John Amato at Crooks and Liars, and he has won the internet today. Thank you, Digby.

Anti-Gay of the Day, Part VI

Via Mr. Sullivan . . .

A reader writes:

At the Calif. Supreme Court hearings today, I saw the lowest of the lows: A pro-Prop 8 protester proudly wielding a hand-written poster which read,

"Dan White: Hero For Killing A Queer."

Not much commentary or reaction I can provide you. I was rendered mute.

But sometimes it's helpful to know where one's opponents are coming from.

Queers - so sensitive. That's just another viewpoint regarding a complex issue about which many people have strong feelings. Perhaps the man's religion does not have a favorable view of queers. We must respect where everyone's coming from on this, and be sensitive to their beliefs, mmm-kay?

Seriously, imagine standing in public with a sign targeting any other group. How quickly would the cops show up and put an end to it, "free speech" be damned? It's still OK to publicly hate teh gays. Jews, blacks, women - you can't say anything you want anymore . . . but because a lot of cave-dwellers think we gays have made this "lifestyle choice" that drives them bonkers for some reason, that's different. Have at it! Go right ahead and make a hand-written sign saying a murderer is a hero because his victim was gay. Nothing's off-limits.

(Besides, queers are so violent!! Who can forget that poor, innocent old woman with her styrofoam cross?? And those kind, loving Xtians who were assaulted in the Castro???)

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[Did Mr. Sullivan just end a sentence with a preposition? OMG.]

Nation "Embarrassed" By (and For) Woman

Can The Axis of Evil just invade us now?

Via MSNBC.com:

Woman 'Embarrassed' by McNugget Meltdown

It seems Latreasa Goodman of Florida (where else??) just wanted some Chicken McNuggets. It was all downhill from there. From nasty Joe Scarborough's show:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

[Note how Joe starts whining about how the cops "arrested the lady who was wronged." Were you not listening, dumbass? She wasn't wronged, she was wrong. (Why does Joe Scarborough hate law enforcement and thus by association the troops and therefore freedom?) Can't they get rid of Joe (R-Fla.) and just make it the Mika and Willie show? Although I'd say that we've all seen just about enough of Ari Fleischer's smarmy-ass, shameless face, so no more him, either, please.]

But back to Latreasa:

"I ordered chicken nuggets. They don't have chicken nuggets, and so I told her, 'Just give me my money back,' and she tells me I have to pick something else off the menu. She is not going to give me my money back, and she don't have the right to take my money."

Girlfriend called fucking 911 because McDonald's was out of fucking Chicken McFuckingNuggets. Three times.

I'm reminded of one of Eric Cartman's more anal expulsive moments:

"I took a crap in the Principal's purse . . . seven times."

But I digress, again. Said Ms. Goodman,

"When you feel that you've been mistreated or misused or robbed out of your money, you have the right to call 911," Goodman said. "That's the purpose of 911, so I thought."

That's right, honey - when you've been mistreated or misused, call 911 immediately. Not 311 - that's for losers; cats in trees and wimpy shit like that. Go directly to 911, and call back two more times when they hang up on your stupid ass. The heart attacks and fires can fucking wait until you get your McNuggets, damn it!!

The absolute best line from the msnbc.com online "story":

Goodman said she'll continue to go to McDonald's, but she also said she'd order with a little more caution next time.

Well, that's a relief, even though caution is not exactly what Ms. Goodman is lacking. Poor thing - it is kind of sad that she thought that was an appropriate response. I bet she's embarrassed. I hope when she reads this post she won't be mad at me.

I cannot wait to tell a United Airlines agent that I'm calling 911 the next time I don't get an upgrade. It will certainly also be used at Starbucks when they are out of the turkey bacon breakfast sandwiches, or don't have frozen bananas with which to make Banana Chocolate Vivanos, or when the girl behind me gets her tall extra-shot cinnamon dolce moss-covered three-handled family credenza no-foam non-fat latte (with room) before I get my grande Americano. Look out, friends on Facebook who don't poke me back in a timely manner!! I'm going Latreasa on your lazy asses.

Anti-Gay of the Day, Part V

OK, so far Anti-Gay of the Day should just be called "Re-Posts from Joe.My.God.", but wevs. This one makes me so fucking mad. (They all do, but this one has its own special brand of hideousness.) Joe reports:

Some of today's anti-gay protesters in San Francisco were bussed in from the Sacramento area's massive Russian/Slavic community, many of whom belong to the extreme right-wing organization Watchmen On The Walls.

Watchmen On The Walls, as the group's website tells you, is an "International Christian Movement for Human Rights". How nice . . . an international Xtian movement for human rights that just happens to be listed as a hate group on the Southern Poverty Law Center's website, that is.



International Christian Movement for Human Rights??? Is it possible to get any more Orwellian?? Exactly whose rights where they moving for today?

Vile. Now we're importing troglodytes from abroad. How exotic.

JMG commenter John T observes:

These people fled Russia to escape religious persecution, and now they and their children have a nice safe tolerant new home in which they are free to religiously persecute others. It's an American tradition as old as the Puritans. The 1st Amendment will always keep things interesting, I suppose.

Fuck them and their racist, xenophobic heritage. That said, I guess maybe they're just trying to blend in . . . we've got plenty of our own home-grown gay-obsessed, magic-believing cult members making trouble right here in 'murca.

Kelly Marie

Mr. Dust has got a lovely Teena Marie birthday tribute post up.

To continue the theme, I offer this fabulous number by Kelly Marie:



That is, of course, the 1990 re-working of her glorious 1980s masterpiece, "It Feels Like I'm In Love".

My Hero, Part II

Fresh on the heels of cb's magnificent victory (part of the ongoing war on parental obliviousness and selfishness) comes Dan's tale of a CTA smackdown extraordinaire.

I was raised with good manners. Hell I used to live down south where in my house, poor manners could get you sent to the dentist, if you know what I am saying, but I digress. So, when I get to the station I hear my train is coming so I start to walk up the escalator but I am stopped in my spot because there is this girl in front of me with her head phones on so loud, she couldn't here the announcement. After saying excuse me three times, I push beside her only to have her call me an asshole.

I transfer trains, same story different person, I-pod blaring I was trying to get around him, we was so caught up in his hip-hop that he didn't hear me so when I pushed my way by him, he too calls me ass wipe!

I get onto my next train and am so worked up, I cant even read the paper. So as I get to my stop and am trying to get off the train, there is this girl, I-Pod going full tilt, that I said excuse me to three times. So again, I find myself pushing around her, where at this time, the little bitch says to me, you could always say excuse me!

NO SHE DID NOT!!!! I stopped in my tracks, kid you not,turned around and pulled the white cord attached to her ear buds gave them a sharp pull and removed them for her and lost it! I snapped "I fucking did say excuse me you dumb bitch, but you couldn't hear it because of these!"

To the astonishment of her and everyone around me, I turned around and got off the train. I am tired of people using today's technology as an excuse to have bad manners. I have said it before about computers. People feel they have an open forum to be rude because of the anonymity. There is no excuse for bad manners or being

The worst part is all these assholes calling him an asshole and presuming to remind him that he "could always say excuse me."

I feel old and John "Old Man Yells at Cloud" McCain-esque each time I find myself launching into a "kids these days" rant, but WTF? When we were twentysomethings, were we that obnoxious on the CTA? Did everyone have that perpetual "Oh, no you di'int" look on their face, ready to turn every interaction with another person into a confrontation? As my old friend Bill L. used to say, "Diss or be dissed", I guess. I know one thing, we didn't have cell phones to yell into as an unspoken "just try and make me shut up" challenge.

Olbermann-Bashing FAIL

From the National Review's list of The Best Conservative Movies

11. The Lord of the Rings (2001, 2002, 2003): Author J. R. R. Tolkien was deeply conservative, so it’s no surprise that the trilogy of movies based on his masterwork is as well. Largely filmed before 9/11, they seemed perfectly pitched for the post-9/11 world. The debates over what to do about Sauron and Saruman echoed our own disputes over the Iraq War. (Think of Wormtongue as Keith Olbermann.) When Frodo sighs, “I wish none of this had happened,” Gandalf’s response speaks to us, too: “So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”

Note the wimpering, gratuitous, inaccurate comparison of Keith Olbermann to Wormtongue (in bold, by me).

Hardly. Think of Sauron as Cheney and Saruman as Turdblossom.

UPDATE 3/5/2009 12:50PM

I forgot to acknowledge where I found this. Shakesville has an alternative Top Ten List that is perfection.

I Don't Even Want To Know

I just saw this graphic on CNN:

Rush's Obama Challenge

Has everyone's favorite Constitution/Declaration of Independence-confusing king of sanctimony issued some kind of formal "challenge" to the President? Or, is CNN just continuing to pay entirely too much attention to this vile blowhard?

I hope that President Obama doesn't expend a single millicalorie attending to what Rush says. The Secret Service should monitor his incendiary bleatings carefully, but Obama has far more important things to worry about. "Ignore it, it'll go away" won't work, but the less oxygen that pig gets the better.

UPDATE 3/5/2009 8:12AM

On the other hand . . .

The weather outside is frightful, but for political junkies the picture-window view couldn't be more frabjous. This morning I heard Don Imus moaning through a hole in his cowboy hat for the umpteenth time that it didn't make sense for Obama to be going after Rush Limbaugh, Imus being too set in his grizzled ways to comprehend the Machiavellian-Sun Tzu-Jedi mind game that's just been played. The result: internecine warfare on the right, with RNC chairman Michael "Not the Man of" Steele and Rush Limbaugh engaged in a weak-assed mortar exchange, David Frum landing some pretty solid punches* against Rush's padded midsection, and rival bloggers firing jockstrap slingshots at each other while Rahm Emanuel relaxes in the Michael Corleone chair of factional strategery, just chillin', babe.

That's the fabulous Mr. Wolcott, of course. He continues:

There are those who say, It's a mistake giving Rush Limbaugh higher visibility, an even bigger platform, lest he go Incredible Hulk on us. Al Giordano refuses to consort with such worrywart, defensive thinking:

I'm in the camp that views the full court surrogate press over Limbaugh's "I hope he fails" comments regarding President Obama as perhaps the most brilliant political play of 2009 to date. The President, his chief of staff, the Senate Majority Leader, the Speaker of the House, the DNC chairman, unions and others have seized upon those comments and are pounding them from every direction.

And in the video above, White House press secretary Robert Gibbs stuck the knife in deeper and twisted it when he said, "maybe the best question, though, is for you to ask individual Republicans whether they agree with what Rush Limbaugh said this weekend. Do they want to see the President's economic agenda fail? You know, I bet there are a number of guests on television throughout the day and maybe into tomorrow who could let America know whether they agree with what Rush Limbaugh said this weekend."

In other words, corner every GOP office holder and surrogate into answering either "yes" or "no" to the question of whether they agree with Limbaugh's desire for the new administration to fail. It puts them in an impossible position. Either say "no" and incur the wrath of Limbaugh and his manifold supporters, or say "yes" and incur the wrath of voters, or run from the question in a way that causes everyone to smell blood in the water and begin circling in for the political kill.

What just happened to new RNC chairman Michael Steele - who when forced to answer that question on live television diminished Limbaugh as a mere "entertainer" and called his schtick "incendiary and ugly," and then had to backpedal when Limbaugh went after him for it (because the GOP donor base includes so many of Limbaugh's 22 million daily listeners) - will and properly should now happen to every one of his allies, up and down the line.

This narrative is going to go on for a while, in large part because in public life you get back what you put in: Limbaugh has, for decades, sought to stigmatize and demonize those with less power than he: single moms, "ugly women" (what Limbaugh says "feminism" is for), African-American political leaders, gays, undocumented immigrants... add up who he has picked on from his microphone demographically and you've got a majority of the American people.

During its Rovian/Fox News heyday, the right tried to make Michael Moore's mug the face of the Democratic Party, hold Democrats responsible for every egregious thing Moore said or did. It only partially succeeded because Moore was too independent an operator to be seamlessly morphed with Al Gore and John Kerry. But Limbaugh bleeds Republican red. He has been glorified and embraced as the perfect Ganesh by Newt Gingrich, CPAC, and the Bush family. He is the face and mouth of the conservative movement. A mouth that has swallowed Michael Steele whole, and has room for plenty more.

I know that wingnuts think that annoying libruls is some kind of accomplishment, and yes, they are very good at it. Do they actually think that they are so annoying to us because they're successful at making us realize that our thinking is flawed? Or, do you think that some of them, from time to time, experience a millisecond of self-awareness and recognize that they're really just being annoying in a fifth grade, "Ha-ha, I made teacher yell at me for acting like an idiot and everyone noticed and I liked the attention and sense of power" kind of way?

UPDATE II 3/5/2009 1:38PM

Tristero writes:

Make It Hoops

Presumably, Obama knows enough to ignore him, but if he doesn't I suggest he counter with a challenge to Limbaugh for a game of one-on-one on the basketball court of his choice.

. . . and in response, commenter JB suggests:

Rush should just host a Q&A session with the various heads of the Republican party: Boehner, McConnell and Steele. Have Rush assert his wackaloon beliefs and ask them if they agree. To watch the pols try and sound sane to regular people while not offending the poo-flinging howler monkey base of their constituency would be fantastically entertaining.

Poo-flinging howler monkey base. I'm so using that.

My Hero

I'm bringing cb of The Mangina Monologues with me the next time I go to the Whole Foods at North & Sheffield. Check this out:

I hate children.

Correction: I only generally dislike children unless they are ill-behaved. THEN I hate them.

And the parents who promote such behaviour really need a good punch in the throat.

Take for example the lovely mother/son combo at the grocery store last night.

The child is screaming it’s precious little head off while STANDING in the shopping cart. There was also some tantrum-style stomping involved.

The mother was blythely continuing to shop, doing absolutely nothing to address her child’s conniption fit.

This simply won’t do in my world.

So I took it upon myself to address the mother.

Cb (in his best condescending, smarmy voice): What an adorable child. You must be so proud.

Mom: *gasp* I can’t believe you just said that to me!!

Cb: and I can’t believe you don’t discipline your squalling brat. I guess we’re even.

I left her staring open mouthed at me as I walked smartly to a quieter portion of the store.

I really have no problem confronting parents in this manner. There really is no excuse for shoddy parenting in my book. The parents fail to set consistant behavioural standards for their children and then subject the rest of the world to their miserable progeny.

This shit has got to stop.

I’m tired of putting up with uncontrolled children and ineffective parents at restaurants, movie theaters, stores, etc.

Why should my public time be ruined because a couple of breeders won’t put a chokechain on their unruly twatpuppies?

Who’s with me on this?

Twatpuppies!! Words cannot express how my spirit soared knowing that at least one obnoxious parent was made aware of their child's annoying behavior yesterday. It is all too rare. (The aforementioned Whole Foods is a hotspot of parental indulgence and rudeness.) By all means, do block the aisle while little Bella or Conner explores their world. Everyone in the store wants to marvel at your fabulous parenting skills as you loudly engage Madison or Zach.

Many hilarious comments of course . . . as well as this one that is all-too-true:

I often wonder what the future will be like when a generation of kids who think they’re the centre of the universe are running the world with zero consideration for anyone else. If I’m not already dead by that stage I’ll soon arrange it.

Seriously! Are any of these brats going to be my doctor??