Fifty Ways

I first heard this song at the Pool at Wynn Las Vegas over July 4th weekend. [Do not click on that link if you don't like hearing Steve Wynn's creepy voice-over.]



It's perfectly Las Vegas, and perfectly Wynn - (addendum 11/20/2009 7:14AM: Whatever that's supposed to mean. Gawd. I think I meant it's a little . . . OK I'm not sure what I meant.)

If you are into Hot Daddy Realness, the "European Pool" at the Wynn in the summer is The Place To Be. OMFG - so much to behold - all that boastful yet imperfect male sexuality on display. Believe me, very nice.

And the song - a contemporary interpretation of a slightly not-so-cool song from our collective childhood memories, re-imagined as a sleek, urban, Playa Anthem. Perfect.

Fun (?) Fact of the Day

Did you know that the Air France flight crews (even the FAs) stay at the Ritz-Carlton in Dearborn when they fly into Detroit?

As a frequent flier and a Francophile I found that très intéressant.

I wonder where Detroit ranks on the Air France crews' list of desirable destinations. Surely not the most glamorous (I mean they are coming from Paris), but at least the creature comforts must be relatively decent, non? I'd much rather hang out at the Ritz-Carlton in suburban Detroit than anywhere in N'Djamena, Chad, par example.

Lady Gaga + Christopher Walken + Cartman = Brilliant

I must say, once you've got Cartman's rendition of "Poker Face" in your head, it's impossible to get it out . . . and now there's this*:



I'm addicted. Get it back up dancer dudes starting at 2:26.

Big thanks to Mr. Sullivan, who calls it "an extremely appropriate Mental Health Break right now". I'd say he's right.

I also agree that in Levi's war of nerves with Sarah Palin . . .

"he is the one not blinking."

And thank you, JMG.

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* - Per YouTube: "This is it, the new release from Mastgrr and HatPerson now combining forces for good under their new moniker, Half Mast/Hat!"

Get This Know-Nothing THING Off the Air*

No, honey . . . you're the "inappropriate" one. Your entire existence is inappropriate. see update below

And where'd ya get the faux bitchy hybrid Texas/Southern accent?

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I'm referring to Prejean, not Larry King.

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UPDATE 11/18/2009 7:59AM

Ugh - re-reading that, "Your entire existence is inappropriate" sounds totally eliminationist. Absolutely not what I meant. She has every right to exist - I should have said that her presence on television as part of the endless parade of sanctimonious hypocrites who make up so much of our fucked-up media culture is entirely inappropriate.

Burn!

I rarely watch The Ed Show on MSNBC, but I'm so glad I saw this yesterday:



It's WATB Tom Tancredo having a "debate" with Markos Moulitsas of DailyKos. After having a totally irrelevant hissy fit about all the horrible, horrible signs that libruls showed up with when protesting Bush (not sure any compared any health care plan to piles of corpses at Dachau, but wevs - why let facts get in the way), he started puking up some crap about how much all the veterans he's talked to totes hate the VA and really want vouchers in order to obtain excellent, accessible health care on their own in the private marketplace. Markos started laughing, and Tancredo tells him to "talk to the veterans."

Oops.

Dear Opposite Married Couple Who Asked Me Switch Seats

Enjoy your precious 3 hours together. I'm sorry I got my seat assignment in 5B before you were upgraded and had to face the terrifying prospect of not sitting next to each other. I'm happy to sit in this bulkhead window seat - please feel free to get up whenever you like while I have to deal with the bitchy queen next to me giving me dirty looks.

Good Gawd I Hate This Fucking Twit

As Ken at Down With Tyranny says:

Is there any limit to what Holy Joe Lieberman can get away with and still caucus with the Dems?

Read this excellent post.

The ghastly, perpetually-constipated (I think it was Camille Paglia who said that) Holy (extremely-embarrassing-Jew) Joe Lieberman makes my skin crawl. As HRH Digby pointed out, Liebermans "not becoming Vice President in 2000 was the only silver lining in that whole ugly mess of an election." Oh, so true.

I too want to see the following happen on Wednesday:

* Senator Reid's announcement that the Senate Democratic caucus has voted to expel Senator Lieberman, of course thereby stripping him of his committee chairmanship.

* Senator Reid's announcement that he is referring the case of Senators Lieberman, Ben Nelson, Blanche Lincoln et al. to the Justice Dept. for investigation with a view to prosecution for bribery.

Word.

Dream Sequence

So I awoke from a fever dream earlier this evening, and for some reason, decided to watch Brokeback Mountain.

What a glorious experience, all over again (even while seim-febrile).

Spoiler alert - (as if that were necessary):

At first I was all critical, hating big-time on Heath’s clumsy Dubya imitation and judging Jake’s Central Casting Westerner/Flyover State Inhabitant too harshly . . . but all that was short-lived.

25-30 minutes into it, I was fully re-captivated. Is not Jake just the absolute personification of the Boyfriend that we all dreamed of throughout adolescence?

And Dog bless them for that scene in the tent. What can one say?

OK, make that both scenes in the tent: The first one . .. . OMG - was anyone’s First Time not like that, at least in sanctified retrospect? And then the follow-up scene with Jake shirtless. . . it's so sweet I cannot stand it.

Ah - le sigh . . . What about the radiant Anne Hathaway?? She is absolutely magnificent in every scene. Check her out here at the Empire State Pride Agenda event on Thursday, courtesy of JMG. She’s 1000% believable throughout the movie, even at, especially at the end when she’s made-up beyond her years . . . but her scene on the phone with Ennis Del Mar – OMG.

Michelle Wlliams – Im sorry, but meh – Heath’s wife and baby-mama in real life . . . blah blah blah. As I said: Meh – kind of not the point here. Still, there is no joy or schadenfreude in her anguish as she sees Jake and Heath kissing passionately. Poor thing.

But moving beyond all that, by the end, scene after scene, alone, without horrible, rude, misguidedly-self-entitled Lincoln Park Trixy bitches saying completely cunty things throughout the movie (as actually experienced by moi at Landmark's Century Centre Cinema), I confess, here on teh intertubes, that I was overwhelmed.

Every day that Ennis opens his closet, Jack is there. Their last moments together were incomplete, unsatisfying, and even violent. [Is there a more poignant scene than the juxtaposition of young Jack in the midst of new love with Ennis vs. middle-aged Jack watching angry unfulfilling Ennis drive away???] Ennis never got to fully and completely tell Jack how much he loved him, and all he has left is the shirt.

BLUB

Homage to Dwight

My first SIRveillance post, and I didn't even take the photo!

I've had a few chances but never seem to pull it off . . . unlike my friend S., who snagged this awesome shot of hotness at the airport on the way to Philly (of course):

Unfathomable

I cannot get my mind around this.

Four Florida teens who allegedly doused a 15-year-old boy with rubbing alcohol and set him on fire could be charged as adults because of the "degree of cruelty" involved in the attack, officials said today.

A fifth boy who is only 13 may be too young to be charged as an adult.

The victim, Michael Brewer, remains on a ventilator in Jackson Memorial Ryder Hospital's burn unit. Dr. Nicholas Namias said Brewer is critically ill with burns over 65 percent of his body.

"Every part of his body is affected…his torso, legs, arms and head. It does look like the burns to his face and hands are not as bad as they could be," said Namias.

The use of an accelerant means the burn injuries will likely get worse in the coming weeks. "We consider flame burns to be worse that most other types of burns," the doctor said.

Brewer is heavily sedated and his body is extremely swollen, doctors said. Even if Brewer makes it through the next few weeks, there is still the likelihood of organ failures and the painful prospect of multiple operations to replace the burned skin, his doctors said.

The vicious assault has shocked the Deerfield Beach community nestled on the Florida coast just north of Fort Lauderdale, not only for the act of setting Brewer afire but for the teens' chilling reaction.

"I'll be honest with you, a couple of them were laughing about it last night. [Only] one of them seemed genuinely sorry for what he did," said Sgt. Steve Feeley, according to ABC News affiliate WPBF.

"The sheriff called it one of the most heinous crimes he has seen in his 31 years in law enforcement. It's a cliche to say a crime has shocked a community, but this crime really has shocked the community," sheriff office spokesman Jim Leljedal told ABCNews.com.

Charged in the attack are Steve Shelton, 15, of Deerfield Beach, Jeremy Jarvis, 13, Denver[*} Jarvis, 15, Matthew Bent, 15, and Jesus Mendez, 15, all of Pompano Beach.

The boys are all charged with aggravated battery, according to the sheriff's office. In addition, Mendez, who police allege actually flicked the lighter that caused the fire, is charged with attempted second degree murder.

So five of these, these . . . things ganged up on a 15 year old classmate, poured rubbing alcohol on him, and then one of them lit him on fire. He lit another human being on fire.

And now, a 15 year-old who two days ago was one of millions of adolescents dealing with the craziness of adolescence has had his life horribly altered, if not taken from him, by five . . . I can't think of a word. Five worthless wastes of carbon-based molecules. For what?? A fucking bike? A video game? As I said, my mind cannot grasp it.

Burn injuries are beyond horrific. The recovery process, if it can really be called that, is so daunting that one might wonder if it is worth it. The wound care is absolute torture for the patients, but it is essential. We've all seen burn victims - their appearances are shocking. It is not their fault, nor ours, that we recoil - human beings are not supposed to look like that . . . and yet as I write/type that, I should be, and am ashamed for even having mentioned my/our reaction to what burn victims look like, after what they've endured and the months/years that it took them to leave the hospital and re-engage in any part of their pre-burn life.

Look how well the mother of one of these monsters has learned the language of victimization:

Since their arrests, parents for some of the boys have said their sons were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Shelton's mother, Patricia Hollis, 42, said her son had no relationship with any of the others and believes he just watched the incident.

"I know kids, when they're young, they wanna see stuff,'' she said. ``I just wish he went the other way.''

I bet you do, you dumb cow . . . only you're not the one who, if you survive your burn injuries, faces a dreadful, grueling hospital stay and a life forever changed. Michael Brewer and his family probably wish he went the other way as well. If you really do "know kids", might you not possibly have done a better job of preventing your spawn from being involved in the act of setting another human being on fire?

The reactions from classmates are beyond depressing, even for illiterate, awkward adolescents:

On Wednesday, students at Deerfield Beach Middle, where the boys were in seventh grade, said the incident has been the talk of the school.

Alicia Cortes, 14, said she had Jeremy Jarvis in her classes.

``Everybody was like, I know Jeremy didn't do anything wrong because he's a good kid,'' she said.

Cortes' brother, Jonathan Sklarenko, 13, said he had heard rumors on Monday at school that ``Michael was a snitch.''

Then, on Tuesday, he heard what happened.

``I was like, what?'' he said.

Ah, I see, he might have been a snitch . . . so someone tries to steal your dad's bike and you're not supposed to do anything about it?

And Alicia - you're dumb. Everybody was like Jeremy didn't do anything wrong because he's a good kid? Is that really what everybody was like?

I'm like, what?

We're so doomed.

The only suitable punishment is for each of the worthless, worthless pieces of shit who ganged up on a 15-year-old and set him on fire is for each of them to be held down by five people, doused in alcohol, and set on fire themselves. Nothing else seems just. They are not allowed to drop and roll, but must also run in unimaginable terror and pain the same distance to a nearby pool, thereby possibly worsening the extent of their burns. I want to contribute to the fund that makes that punishment possible.

UPDATE 10/16/2009 11:00PM

[Edited for clarity, above.]

Video of a local news update here. Look at those thugs in court. Ugh. [Nice attempt at a mustache, tough guy.] WTF with the other one's lawyer?? "He's upset how he's being portrayed"?!?!?? Did girlfriend actually say that?? Quick, get an image consultant . . . and lose those cornrows or whatever the fuck thatis you're doing with your hair. That shit looks like glycoproteins on HIV. Loser. So glad his mother is praying for Michael Brewer. Spare me, sister.

OMG I've got to stop watching these videos: "I don't know what he coulda did once the kid was in flame." Hello you stupid fucking cow, the kid didn't spontaneously combust!! What he coulda did, dumbshit was do something, anything, to stop one of your offspring's fellow gansta-wannabes from lighting another human being on fire. Can we light her on fire too? Or at least sterilize her before she inflicts more of her spawn upon the rest of us?

It's sad that the local reporter Roger Lohse (anyone else getting a gay vibe?) has to say "alleged victim".

How on earth can the attorney for the thing who lit Michael Brewer on fire call that act "a tragic event for all parties involved"? Tragic for Michael, yes. For the monster who lit him on fire?? Not so much.

And what about the other one's lawyer? Utterly shameless. A 13 year old is sitting in jail away from his parents??? Boo-fucking-hooHow can anyone get on camera and say that, knowing what's happened??? He's crying? My heart bleeds. He's traumatized??? At least he'll still be able to bend his arms for the rest of his life.

[How about that one anchor? I kind of lover her - I think she displays actual abstract thought then she reiterates what I've said above . . . and her studied, über-precise, totally American affect is captivating.]

And excuse me - why the fuck do the "news" reporters keep using the term "snitched" and giving it validity? I believe that in some sectors of semi-civilized society, it's still known as "reporting a crime".

Finally - at one point, one of the "news" readers refers to the national coverage this story has been getting. I do exist in something of an echo chamber, but it seems to me that the only young man with whom the nation is currently concerned en masse is that goddamn "Balloon Boy" - not the young man who was set on fire by five of his "friends" and neighbors. I've just finished Charles P. Pierce's excellent Idiot America. At one point, describing the impact of Idiot America's intrusion into the hospice where Terri Shiavo was being cared for, Pierce notes: "There was apparently a bottomless national desire for a televised freak show."

Sadly, so true.

The Balloon Boy's parents were on "Wife Swap"?? OMG!! Where can I learn more??? Five thugs light a classmate on fire?? Yawn. I mean, like, one of them was a "good kid", and besides, Michael Brewer prolly shouldn't have "snitched".

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* - Sidebar: Please note that Denver's middle name is "Colorado". Denver Colorado Jarvis. Jesus Fucking Christ. What the fucking fuck?